Unfaithful
by Brookebynature
Summary: She couldn’t look into those beautiful deep blue eyes and tell him that she was sleeping with someone else. Because then she had to see the pain she was causing him. BL one shot


**Author- **Emily-Grace Mendes (Brookebynature)

**Disclaimer- **I don't town the characters or the song. that belongs to Rihanna, and is an absolutely amazing song. If i knew her, I'd personally congratulate her. But I don't, so I can't. (unless she reads my fan fiction)

**A/N- **Another little Brucas one shot (I seem to be in that kind of a mood lately) It could be AU, or not, just depends how you interpret it. Hope you enjoy xxx

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**Unfaithful**

One more kiss and she tumbled over the edge, pleasure searing through her body like a torrent of water, gripping her and holding her right there, in that moment for a few seconds before she tucked the sheets around her body and made her way to the bathroom.

The fan whirled noisily as if trying to help her block out the thoughts of Lucas back home about what he'd be doing, about what he'd be thinking, knowing exactly where she was right now.

And yet, even though she knew he knew, she couldn't tell him. She couldn't look into those beautiful deep blue eyes and tell him that she was sleeping with someone else. Because then she had to see the pain she was causing him, and so what if it was cowardly? At least she could admit to herself that she couldn't do it.

_Story of my life  
Searching for the right  
But it keeps avoiding me_

Brooke didn't know what she wanted. She didn't know whether she wanted to spend the rest of her relationship with him flitting from guy to guy, hoping each one would bring her some relief, some escapism. And from time to time, they did. It was a change, a break from her life at home. But it wasn't right.

_Sorrow in my soul  
Cause it seems that wrong  
Really loves my company_

And she actually felt sorry for herself. Not sorry for Lucas, the guy she was cheating on, humiliating in front of everyone, _because they all knew, _but sorry for her: Brooke Davis.

Throughout all of these years, he'd been there, promising each day that he loved her, and she'd replied with a simple

"I love you too" It hadn't been a lie. She did love him. Just maybe not enough.

They lay in bed together, one night where things had been perfect, just the two of them, two bowls of ice cream: cookie dough and cherry Garcia. Different, just like the two of them were. A little too different perhaps, but for that one night, it worked.

He stroked her shiny brunette hair as her eyes flickered shut, one arm draped across his chest, her lips against the short stubble on his neck that she loved so much. And she could smell his cologne, that musky scent that up until now, she hadn't found on anyone else. It gave her security, told her that he was there, arms open, waiting for her. But would she ever be ready?

_He's more than a man  
And this is more than love  
The reason that the sky is blue_

But what was it that made her leave each week? Head to _his _house purely just for sex. No love making, no holding each other afterwards. Was it the fact that she didn't love Lucas as much as she told him and herself that she did? Or was she just scared?

She returned, from _his_ house, where Lucas knew she'd been. And she knew he knew. He was sat there, a dvd on the coffee table, pizza box on the floor, vegetable supreme, her favourite. And he knew it was, and she knew he'd ordered it for her.

He didn't ask where she'd been, he didn't need to. Or maybe he just didn't want to know. But she settled down beside him anyway, his arm wrapping around her small frame almost instantly. And she gave him a smile, and he returned it, before kissing her, the softest of kisses placed upon her forehead. And she knew she didn't want to leave again.

_But clouds are rolling in  
Because I'm gone again  
And to him I just can't be true_

But the night next, she did the same thing, her hair put up the same way, red lipstick matching the nail polish.

"You look beautiful" he told her, and for a moment, he thought she was going to stay. Tell him that she didn't want to be with that other guy, that she wanted him and only him, and that she was sorry. But she didn't.

"Thanks" she whispered, almost inaudibly, but he heard her. And he kissed her temple, waiting for some kind of reaction. He got nothing.

And before he knew it, he was staring again, at the spot she'd been sat in, getting ready for _him. _And he knew he shouldn't still love her. But he did.

_And I know that he knows I'm unfaithful  
And it kills him inside_

She walked down the street, knowing exactly where she was going, but not why she was going there. It was dimly lit, perhaps to make her feel even worse, or maybe it was just the fact that the bulbs in the street lamps weren't very bright. Either way, she thought back to Lucas once again, knowing he'd wait up for her. And they'd go to bed together like nothing had happened, even though both could think of nothing else. Maybe they just weren't going to work.

_To know that I am happy with some other guy  
I can see him dying_

He had that same expression each time she left. One of confusion, of sadness of disappointment that yet again, he couldn't get her to stay.

_  
I don't wanna do this anymore  
I don't wanna be the reason why  
Everytime I walk out the door  
I see him die a little more inside_

She knew he cried. Often she came home, and his blue eyes wouldn't be clear and easy to read. They were sad, filled with tears. She did that to him, and she hated herself for it. But he'd done it to her. All those years ago and it still hurt. Maybe he knew that. Maybe that's why he stayed.

_I don't wanna hurt him anymore  
I don't wanna take away his life  
I don't wanna be...  
A murderer_

Brooke wondered just how long he could let himself fall victim to her charms, to her powers of seduction. She knew just what to say to get him wanting her, needing her. So maybe it was cruel, and she was stopping him from having fun, from enjoying himself. But it was starting to get to her too. She could just stop.

_I feel it in the air  
As I'm doing my hair  
Preparing for another date_

But that was easier said than done. The familiar scent of her perfume filled the air as she slid one last slide into her hair, completing the final twist. It was silent, and she knew he was watching from the hallway. Yet she didn't turn around and look at him. It made things too hard.

She stood up and smoothed down her red dress, a new dress, one that Lucas hadn't seen before. And he knew that _he'd_ bought it for her, because it was Armani. Lucas couldn't afford Armani. Still, he let his lips linger on her soft skin as he whispered

"Have a good time"

She nodded and avoided his gaze. "You too. Tell the guys I said hi."

"I will" There was a huge lump in his throat now. He wanted to scream or punch something, anything. But he kept silent and watched as she grabbed her purse from the closet.

_A kiss upon my cheek  
As he reluctantly  
Asks if I'm gonna be out late_

"I'll be back before midnight" she told him.

"It's cold out, do you want me to drive you?" He knew it was a long shot, but it was, in fact, chilly, and the November wind against her thin body could do more harm than good.

"I'll be fine"

She saw the pain in his eyes as she tried to make it seem as though she wasn't going where he thought she was. But she couldn't, and that pain didn't go away.

"But thanks." she paused and offered him a small smile "For offering."

He nodded and kissed her once more, taking in the flowery scent, the same scent that Lucas knew _he'd _get to smell as he devoured her body, inch by inch.

_I say I won't be long  
Just hanging with the girls  
A lie I didn't have to tell  
Because we both know  
Where I'm about to go  
And we know it very well_

And he stared at that brown door once again, loathing the view of the mahogany wood, but he couldn't avert his gaze to anywhere else. The dvd was out on the coffee table again, which, later, would be accompanied by a pizza, vegetable supreme, Brooke's favourite. He had no intention of inviting the guys over, he wanted to sink into that couch and think about her until she returned. So what if he was wallowing in self-pity? Plenty of other people did it, maybe they just didn't have the guts to admit it.

He knew it was payback. Payback for what he'd done to her all of those years ago. So who was he to give up on them? Because if he did that now, then there would be no hope for them in the future. And all he wanted was her.

_Cause I know that he knows I'm unfaithful  
And it kills him inside_

As _he _peeled off her bra she whispered breathlessly to him that it was the last time. That she wouldn't be back. And this time, she didn't doubt herself. Because Lucas had suffered enough, and so had she.

She knew just how bad it felt, to know that you weren't good enough, to know that you weren't the only one capable of making a person happy. And it hurt. She was done now.

_To know that I am happy with some other guy  
I can see him dying_

Maybe she hadn't finished making him pay, maybe she hadn't finished running. Maybe she was being selfish, because she couldn't handle the guilt. But then, who wasn't selfish?

_I don't wanna do this  
Anymore_

She returned home, a tub of ice cream in her hand. Cherry Garcia, his favourite. And this time, it wasn't accompanied by the usual cookie dough. After all, the cherry sauce and fruit pieces weren't so bad. That dimpled smile was back on her face as she entered the house, faltering when she saw the vegetable supreme pizza on the coffee table. It was next to her favourite dvd: Crash.

Brooke loved the way how the characters appreciated things so much more in the end, how the people of this world weren't all bad, and how love was so much better than anything else.

And she wondered why it had taken her until now to realise that. She unwrapped the black scarf from around her neck, but didn't hang it up, and instead, made her way upstairs to her closet.

She stripped it of virtually everything, at least, everything that _he'd _bought her. So what if she didn't have many clothes now? She didn't need Fendi purses and Dior Shoes. She didn't need that red Armani dress, even though she loved how it looked. She just needed Lucas. He was enough.

The clothes lay on a heap in the middle of the landing, and she just left them there, not even looking back to take a second glance. But instead, she made her way back downstairs, picking up the tub of ice cream she'd left on the set of drawers by the door.

Lucas looked up as she entered the room, the red dress no longer covering her body. Instead, a pair of sweats and his grey hoody had taken it's place, causing a huge smile to break out across his face.

"I missed you" Brooke said softly. She meant it.

"I missed you too"

"And I brought you ice cream." She handed him the bag and he looked in it, frowning.

"Where's your cookie dough?"

"Turns out I like Cherry garcia more than I thought."

His hands were tangling in her hair now, hot kisses trailing along her neck. She backed onto the couch, him falling on top of her as the pizza and ice cream lay forgotten, just as the red dress on the landing was.

"I need you Lucas" she told him, her hazel eyes finally looking into his ones of intense blue. She had nothing more to hide now, nothing to cover up, brush past. She'd just admitted to him, in her own way, that she was sorry, and she hoped he knew.

"I need you too"

He knew.

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Please review, you know you want to...


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